A New Pair of Glasses
Reasons Not to Worry: How to Be Stoic in Chaotic Times (2023) by Brigid Delaney: 9 out of 10: is a modern exploration of Stoic philosophy, offering practical guidance on how to navigate life’s uncertainties and challenges with resilience, calm, and clarity. Delaney draws on the ancient teachings of Stoic philosophers like Marcus Aurelius, Seneca, and Epictetus, weaving their timeless wisdom into a relatable, contemporary context.
The book focuses on the core principles of Stoicism—such as controlling what is within your power, accepting what is not, and practicing gratitude—and shows how these ideas can help individuals manage anxiety, stress, and overwhelm in an increasingly unpredictable world. Through a blend of personal anecdotes, philosophical insights, and real-world examples, Delaney demonstrates how Stoicism is more than a historical curiosity; it’s a toolkit for emotional stability and rational thinking in the face of chaos.
With a compassionate and accessible tone, “Reasons Not to Worry” serves as both an introduction to Stoic thought and a practical guide for anyone seeking to cultivate a more grounded and worry-free mindset.
The Good
The Good: The issues with any self-help book are that the lessons could be an email. There simply is not a philosophy that requires a full-length book. If there is, it has a whole other set of issues.
That said, if your only exposure to Stoicism is Marcus Aurelius’s “Meditations” and some Ryan Holiday videos, you are in for a treat. Brigid Delaney covers parts of Stoicism that surprised me. (For example, the chapter about ataraxia.) And I considered myself well read on the subject.
Also in her favor, she starts off pretty early with five rules to being a Stoic, which are concise, accurate and a pleasant reminder. It is good to hear a distinct voice on the subject with a different point of view, and that is what I am hoping to get from this book. A new pair of glasses.
My least favorite part of Stoicism is negative visualization, or futurorum malorum præmeditatio, which is a Stoic practice that involves imagining worst-case scenarios in order to prepare for them. The Stoics believed external events are indifferent, and that only their reaction to events could be good or bad. For example, negative visualization could involve imagining your car breaking down, losing your left arm, or a dragon eating your wife.
I have never gotten the hang of this and was of the opinion I did too much negative visualizations as it is. Well, Brigid Delaney has successfully changed my way of thinking. This 45 minute (on audiobook) treatise of the practice of imagining death and living every day broke through my wall of fear as no other reading on the same has.
This discourse, along with that pithy cheat sheet in the opening chapters, has prompted me to pick up the book on Kindle to make it easy to reference. Reasons Not to Worry is truly a resource worth revisiting, no matter where you are in your Stoic teachings.
The Bad
The Bad: There is a chapter that was a complete disaster, but at least it was memorable. Our author Brigid Delaney had a friend who found her thirtysomething self in the hospital with sudden bowel cancer in the middle of the pandemic. I don’t have to be reminded how horrifying such a predicament is.
Our author heroine decides to use WhatsApp and give her pain riddled friend in a public ward in a run down public hospital impromptu lessons in Stoicism. Her friend responds after hearing the first WhatsApp recording… loved it should be a podcast. I am pretty sure should be a podcast means eff off in Australian.
The chapter does not end with Brigid’s friend dying or avoiding her at all subsequent parties. However, Brigid is blind to the idea one should not proselytize Stoicism. This is accounted for in stoic philosophy. Just live your life as a good stoic and be an example is the idea. On the other hand, if she took that teaching to heart, perhaps we would not have this excellent book.
The Ugly
The Ugly: Brigid Delaney is a columnist at The Guardian. She initially looked into Stoicism for a snarky article about what the dude bros were up to. Her Guardian roots slip through occasionally. There is a diatribe about the importance of socialized medicine in the chapter on preferred indifferents.
The last twenty percent of the chapter on anger is a spiel how that being a Stoic does not excuse you from supporting worldwide causes (She also goes on the attack against Buddhists for some reason)
But it is her Global Warming spiel towards the end that honestly made me laugh out loud. Now she is describing its effects in all these countries where she has witnessed the devastation firsthand it occurs to me she is a travel writer by trade and now while I am sure that there are some jobs that contribute more to the global warming crisis, one would think that a travel writer has to be in the top ten? No? I mean, the whole point of the profession is to encourage people to take unnecessary airline flights. I am sure the Furies from The Great Transition would have travel writers on their assassination lists.
The Ugly (Rebuttal)
The Ugly (Rebuttal): Brigid has spent much of Reasons Not to Worry, with one foot in her Guardian column activism and one foot in Stoicism. Then she does something amazing. Perhaps speculating that neither her colleagues, bosses, nor regular readers will bother to read the entire book, in the last chapter, she attacks the idea of victimhood.
Victimhood is an anathema of Stoicism. It is also the keystone of the philosophy holding her employer’s newspaper together. If there is one thing the Guardian loves, it is victims. If a tornado hits somewhere in the Midwest, the Guardian will look for a marginalized person among the wreckage to explain how thier trailer being destroyed is a greater injustice.
That Brigid takes the wheel and runs over victimhood with such effectiveness, she backs up and runs over it again just to be sure makes me think the Stoicism has really stuck. Good for her. Should make for some interesting cocktail party talk in the future.
In Conclusion
In Conclusion: “You don’t have to have an opinion on everything.” But if I choose to have an opinion on Brigid Delaney’s “Reasons Not to Worry: How to Be Stoic in Chaotic Times (2023)” I would say this book expands past just being an excellent introduction for those new to Stoicism to being a great resource to those well versed on the subject. An excellent read and resource.
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Random Notes from reading
The issues with any self-help book are that the lessons could be an email. There simply is not a philosophy that requires a full-length book. If there is, it has a whole distinct set of issues. It is the reason the Bible is full of parable and poetry. I mean the 10 commandments can fit on a wallet card. Let’s list twenty pages of people who gave birth to another.
So the real question with any self-help book is that is the lesson clearly described? Is the lesson useful? Does the filler stuff back up the lessons of the book or is at least entertaining? (The New Testament scores points on the backing up of the lesson. The Old Testament has a lot more incest porn and bear murder. (That’s murder by a bear, not off a bear. If I recall correctly, the bear murders children who made fun of a man’s receding hairline. Like I said, lessons not so much.)
Well, if it isn’t the baby’s first stoic book. Brigid is an at large reporter for the Guardian based out of Australia. She did a fun piece on doing Stoicism for a week back in 2018. But something about the philosophy stuck with her. She seems to have read more than the Wikipedia entries and has a philosopher partner whom she takes long walks on the beach with.
Also in her favor, she starts off pretty early with five rules to being a Stoic, which honestly are concise, accurate and a pleasant reminder. It is good to hear a distinct voice on the subject with a different point of view, and that is what I am hoping to get from this book. A new pair of glasses. So far, I am not blown away by any means, but I am cautiously neutral like any good Stoic would be.
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Well, this has been a change of pace. My least favorite part of Stoicism is Negative visualization, or futurorum malorum præmeditatio in Latin, which is a Stoic practice that involves imagining worst-case scenarios in order to prepare for them. The Stoics believed external events are indifferent, and that only their reaction to events could be good or bad. For example, negative visualization could involve imagining your car breaking down, losing your left arm, or a dragon eating your wife.
I have never gotten the hang of it and was of the opinion I did too much negative visualizations as it is and it already haunted me. Well, Brigid Delaney has successfully changed my way of thinking. This 45 minute (on audiobook) treatise of the practice and death and living every day broke through my wall of fear as no other reading on the same has. This, along with that pithy cheat sheet in the opening chapters, has done two things. I picked up the book on kindle to make it easy to reference and I am looking at a recommended five star review so far.
This book has eclipsed my baby’s first Stoicism/ I read a few books and a Wikipedia page impression I initially had. Kudos.
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Today’s lesson is about control. And once again, a fresh set of glasses comes in very handy. I can tell the Brigid Delaney is a novelist and, by my guess, a pretty good one. Her description of a social influencer event in Sydney to promote a rosé at a mansion on the harbor while the city outskirts burned around them and the ash flavored every breath and sip of rosé.
She has a real Masque of the Red Death feeling to the proceedings, to the point one expects a zombie movie to break out, but of course it would be a more thematically appropriate plague.
In the end, the simple rules of figuring out what you control and what you do not and focusing only on what you can control is the heart of Stoicism. Our author had finally reached her goal of being a travel writer full-time with decent pay in 2019, and we can imagine how that worked out for her.
She gives a cautionary tale about her friend Michelle who was a digital nomad in Australia enjoying hook up sex a couple of times a week with no strings and drinks with the girls other nights and how the onerous lockdown in Australia ruined all that and drove her to madness and despair. Again, some real Masque of the Red Death stuff here.
Michelle’s life of easy money and uncomplicated sex was ruined and she could not cope while our author enjoyed tennis lessons and learning to drive by fitting within the parameters of the lockdown. (I am reminded from her accounts of the madness of wearing a mask outdoors while exercising, which even to a Stoic has to be thought of as the silliest thing.)
Anyway, a wonderful chapter with unexpected horrors spread throughout and a glorious reminder that you control how you treat and react to people, something that, if you are mindful of, can do wonders to help or heal your relationships.
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Today’s chapter was preferred indifferents. Now I understand this author is a columnist at the Guardian and has been champing at the bit to get some left wing bonafides into her Stoic book at some point. I am not saying that Stoicism is necessarily a right wing philosophy by any means it is no more naturally right wing than say Christianity, but its adverts can tend to be so. Though to his credit, Stoic guru Ryan Holiday goes against what I assume is his natural listeners (And his neighbors in rural texas) and is fairly progressive himself.
So Brigid Delaney has a somewhat awkward spiel about socialised medicine. No matter how you feel about the topic, I think we can all agree it was crowbar’d in there.
Outside of that, which came across like that one speech in the Barbie movie, this is an excellent chapter. Part of the reason is she herself experienced life with a comically oversized puffer jacket. She compares herself to Cato in her wearing of such a garment. While that may be a stretch and she certainly enjoyed some of the notoriety that it gave her. (There is a fine line between not caring what people think and courting notoriety.)
I feel her experience. I too was given a comically oversized puffer jacket that made me look like the Michelin Man. My parents gave it to me when I was 16 for a ski trip, as what I assume was a form of birth control. To thier credit, it worked amazingly well. I was not stoic when I was 16 about being forced to wear such a ridiculous garment. If I am to be completely honest, I am unsure if I am still over it forty years later.
There is also talk of going without as a insure oneself against misfortune. Much like we picture bad things happening to us, we may fast or go without showing ourselves we can survive discomfort. I’m surprised she didn’t mention camping trips more, which is the traditional way western men have roughed it for a while to reset themselves and test thier mettle. She danced around it a touch (Describing an absolutely disgusting eastern Asian fast for example) but seemed to never had made the connection. I chalk that up to a gender difference since most men would immediately recognize eating nothing but beans and sleeping on rocks. It is called camping Brigid.
She also covered illness, saying it was the most difficult, but we remember that good health, like good looks, is a matter of luck and fate and we all die or get ugly, eventually. No matter how much we work out and how good our diet is. It is only our character that we truly control. An excellent lesson to revisit.
Overall, despite a trip to The Guardian for a paragraph or two, an excellent chapter not just on what a preferred indifferent is but the way we should view and handle such things. Bravo.
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Chapter nine on the audio How to be Relaxed… Today’s chapter is all about ataraxia,
First, excellent coverage of this topic. I have read and spent time with various stoic authors. I am unfamiliar with the concept as presented here. There are some good tips, such as mediation and imagining yourself and your problems as a tiny speck from space unimportant to the universe. Monty Python’s Galaxy Song is particularly good regarding this if you need to get in the mood.
In fact, Monty Python songs are often a good match for Stoicism, such as Always Look on the Bright Side of Life or Every Sperm is Sacred.
Admittedly, our author Brigid Delaney does not give us “The Secret” or a quick way to universal tranquility. One thing she recommends is watching your highs from good news from outside sources. By tamping down one’s highs, one also practices tamping down ones lows.
Much like the previous chapter on indifferents, I find this a fantastic reminder. One thing that we need to be conscious of until we make it a habit. Part of our DNA. Overall, an excellent read still and again a wonderful word that is Ataraxia.
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Today’s chapter wandered over finally to character and the question whether we are a good person
First a caveat a little of the Guardian leaked in as the examples she uses for poor character were Britain’s Cameron and the US’s Trump. And while Trump certainly would be a poster boy for character defects, the lack of balance on the examples lifts an eyebrow. (There is no shortage of people with hilariously bad character of all political persuasions.)
But here I go worrying about other’s character instead of my own. Have I forgotten the lessons I listened to only a few minutes ago? There are some nice asides a van dweller in a train station parking lot trying to give away to her fifty bucks starts us on this journey. The question of whether being good is our nature, whether we should follow that nature and if we need religion with its rewards and punishments to keep us on the straight and narrow.
Lots to think about and a nice angle to look at the can only worry about what you control. You cannot control others’ character, so don’t worry about them. Also, a pleasant reminder not to make your goodness transactional. The act itself is the gift and wanting something in exchange is again you causing yourself stress and discomfort with other people’s actions.
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First half of 45 minute chapter on reacting to events with emotions. So far it is a bit of a snore, I confess. We don’t control events, but we control our reactions to events. The best way to control your reactions is to take a breath and think, then react. Today on easier said than done.
This also has a touch of the great Stoic quote, “You don’t have to have an opinion on everything.”
Marcus Aurelius, a Roman emperor and philosopher who lived from 121 to 180 AD, wrote, “It is in our power to have no opinion about a thing, and not to be disturbed in our soul; for things themselves have no natural power to form our judgments.”
This is a personal favorite of mine, as I have found it most useful in recent times. Implementing this philosophy in personal interactions is very helpful. If someone seems to insult you or react poorly, it is perfectly fine to have no opinion of the interaction and simply not react.
Up next, if I manage a proper walk starting earlier in the day will be the rest of this chapter and a short fifteen minute follow up chapter.
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Well, I finished the chapter, and it did not really improve much honestly. The whole 45 minutes was quite forgettable. I want to be a passionate person who lives every minute to the fullest and also be stoic in all my affairs, really does not work. Stoics are not impressed by novelty I have noticed and our author still is, I am afraid.
The next chapter was a complete disaster, but at least it was memorable. Our author Brigid Delaney had a friend who found her thirtysomething self in the hospital with sudden bowel cancer in the middle of the pandemic. I don’t have to be reminded how horrifying such a predicament is.
Our author heroine decides to use WhatsApp and give her pain riddled friend in a public ward in a run down public hospital impromptu lessons in Stoicism. Her friend responds after hearing the first WhatsApp recording… loved it should be a podcast. I am pretty sure should be a podcast means fuck off in Australian.
The chapter does not end with her friend dying or avoiding her at all subsequent parties as our all our author’s friends fleeing for the hills as she assaults them with control flowcharts.
The funny thing is the idea one should not proselytize Stoicism is accounted for in stoic philosophy. Just live your life as a good stoic and be an example is the idea. I bring this up because I did not get the same memo when I first got into Stoicism and, for the record; it cost me some good make up sex. (Lady friend invites me over for a booty call/ make up sex and I decide this would be a good time for a stoic lesson.)
Alas, our writer does not learn her lesson here. (I suppose if she did she would not have written the book) A great stoic philosopher named Julian Kennedy once said you can often learn more from an idiot doing it wrong than an expert doing it right.
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The witty thing would be to say that the chapter on anger made me angry. The more stoic thing to say is that it exposed a major character flaw of mine that I need to work on. Mainly my need to feel superior to other people. It is a form of anger and fear; I am told, and I agree. It is a major character flaw of mine that I need to work on creating a better life, or both myself and those I am around.
Brigid Delaney also has a major flaw. No, not her alcoholism, which I think she covers in the next chapter. It is her incessant need to virtue signal to let others know she is not just a good person, but the right kind of good person with the right ideals. Not a drunk bestselling author who is somehow still renting well into her thirties a (And apparently still unmarried) despite the patina of success and respectability. See what I am talking about. I am really judgy. Need to work on that.
I am sure there are reasons she is unmarried. Perhaps she is not attractive… Okay, now I am just kidding around. It could be her personality, lack or morals, and drinking problem? Alright, I will stop now. This has gotten to silly and mean. Perhaps she smells… Aright moving on…
Brigid Delaney puts down the argument that not just can you focus on social justice movements like Black Lives Matters and the Me Too movement, but it is a major part of Stoicism to do so.
She makes some excellent arguments on this subject, complete with quotes and personal experience. Alas, the arguments she makes are against the focus on social justice movements. It is a true virtual signalling wants cake or even more importantly wants to be seen eating said cake.
She points out the tens of thousands of hours she wasted reading about, arguing about, and getting angry about President Doanld Trump. She points out as an Australian, getting angry about the president of another country is a waste of time. And she is correct. I would argue that it is just as much a waste of time for Americans. Vote sure, donate to candidates, heck maybe watch a debate, but outside of that, do you really need to worry so much about something you have no control over? Of course not American or not It is a waste of time and is getting you worked up for no reasons.
Trump supporters called it Trump derangement syndrome. And while I have little use for die hard Trump supporters, they have a slight point. I recall the people who spent eight years rendering thier clothes in frustration at George Bush Jr and nothing came of it.
So she agrees it is a waste of time and it gets one angry with no real purpose. And then for the last couple of pages we have a boiler plate declaration (I would not call it an argument) that of course you can support social movements. What is left off is how you can support such movements. Are we talking about a bumper sticker? (I don’t know if our Brigid Delaney can drive yet. She was working on her license, so perhaps a sticker for her work laptop).
But should one spend thousands of hours getting worked up over something that you have no control over and does not really affect you directly in any way? Probably not.
It is not just Stoics that get a bit of stick for this Buddhists are also right there under the bus with thier passivity and love of others and calm nature. Bastards.
Seriously, the Anger chapter was doing so well for the first 80 percent before our author drove it into a ditch on the off chance one of her coworkers might read this far and question her commitment to the boilerplate points of views.
Protip the first lesson is not caring what other people think of you. It is a superpower and eliminates the need to virtue signal. It is truly freeing to (as Mark Manson might point out) not give a fuck.
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Temperance. Eat to sat hunger, drink to satisfy thirst, clothe yourself to ward off cold and house yourself to be comfortable.
This chapter does not have my favorite piece of Stoic advice on temperance, which is to enjoy cheap wine, so you never feel the need only to drink the expensive stuff. A dull palate is your friend.
Our author figured out something I think almost every adult goes through in thier early thirties… I cannot drink like that anymore. Some successfully cut back on thier drinking. Some like myself choose to abstain entirely and others are full steam ahead alas.
Again, we seem to have a worry in this chapter that being stoic is somehow judgmental of people. The drunks and the obese will cry about genetics or other factors when the author proposes such moderate stances. I keep getting the feeling as we get into the weeds that our author wants everyone to like her and does not want to hurt anyone’s feelings. And while this is an admirable goal, it is impeding a clear, concise description of stoic practices.
More problematic worrying about what other people think about you goes against the heart of the practice.
The stoic philosophy of taking only what you need when you need it is at the heart of temperance and Brigid Delaney, to her credit, does wisely point out this is a philosophy often shared by native cultures around the globe. It is a good way to live your life in balance with nature. There is nothing touchy feely about this.
Those that have embraced minimalism, for example, can tell you that having fewer things and better things makes life more enjoyable and seems to reduce stress. Taking only what you require from life and being moderate in all your needs is a great way to reduce stress. Not worrying about the fanciest of foods and drink and cloth is a great way to look at things.
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Well, we punished off a few somewhat lengthy chapters on a very hot afternoon walkies. (Global Warming is real in Florida at least.) The main takeaways were the art of being happy with what you have instead of always wanting the next thing. Brigid Delaney used an example of how other people in her apartment building had a better view of Sydney harbor than she did.
She found that visiting thier apartments took away some of the joy she felt in her apartment. A very understandable and eventually destructive approach. She spoke at length about hedonic adaptation, which is the psychological term for wanting always more, newer, better, etc.
She pointed out how old this issue was and how the Stoics talked at length about it. The other issue this chapter covered was the destructiveness with fame. While Stoics saw wealth as a preferred indifferent. They viewed fame as a destructive drug. I loved the way she pointed out the pitfalls and fleetingness of fame and the foolishness of pursuing something you certainly cannot control.
While the chapter “Be Happy With What You Got” was firing on all cylinders, the previous chapter “How to Be on Social Media” might make you want to check your book cover. Not that the advice is poor or not in the stoic tradition. Quite the opposite. The question was did the same person giving such sage advice about social media and the need not to have opinions on everything was the same person who wrote the previous chapter on Anger where she goes all in about having opinions about things she has no control or personal knowledge of and broadcasting said opinions to make herself feel better and to raise her standing among her like-minded peers?
Are we sure this is the same author?
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Well, we polished off another couple of good sized chapters. The first one was FOMO. the second one was anxiety.
Okay, first some advice that may technically not be Stoic, but I disagree a smidge with the author. Now I understand the author works for The Guardian and writes a column for the same, so part of her job is to be tuned into the happenings in the world and on social media.
I think this really blinds her to some very simple advice that is good for the soul Stoicism or no. Stay off fucking Instagram and stop reading/ watching the news. Trust me, if something important (or local) happens, it will filter down to you.
I once spent six weeks canoeing in Ontario in a time before smart phones (or mobile phones in reality) and it was glorious to be away from the media for that length of time. I remember trying to watch TV when I came back and I could distinctly hear the laugh tracks on my favorite shows and found the whole exercise of watching TV alien. (It turns out Three’s Company is not that funny.)
A 45 day vacation from social media and the news is just as glorious. For one thing, you will free up a surprising amount of productive time if you stay off Instagram or Reddit. No one will naturally feel less stress not being assaulted by clickbait stories professionally designed to make you anxious. I don’t need to read about the upcoming election, for example. I have a good idea how I am going to vote. Anything more is simply entertainment, like following a sports team and rooting for my side. My time and mind are better spent elsewhere.
This blind spot she has where knowing what is going on in the world every day runs counter to too much of the Stoic’s own advice. Something she constantly reveals this blind spot puts a damper on her advice.
Outside of the fact, I simply do not really suffer from much FOMO. (If I do, it would be at work where I like to be in the loop). The anxiety chapter that follows is quite top notch. It has an excellent summary of James Stockdale’s experience and use of criticism in the Vietnamese prisoner of war camp. It also points out something I need to be reminded of occasionally. If you don’t have hope, you won’t have fear. Fear and hope feed off each other and are the same sides of the same coin. You could lose everything tomorrow. If you have your character, you can move forward.
Also brilliant advice about just focusing on and taking the next step expert advice to anyone trying to accomplish anything, whether it is a diet and exercise program, a new relationship, or writing a novel,.
Overall and excellent chapter that once again gets to the roots of the stoic experience, the authors occasional blind spots not withstanding.
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And we are at the end of the book that appropriately ends with death. It was death that brought me into Stoicism myself. Not my own death, of course, but the death of my wife of sixteen years. She was healthy and relatively young and was simply struck down by ovarian cancer, and there was nothing anyone could do about it.
The thing is, it was not my grief that prompted me to seek a philosophy. It was the realization that during the nine months of her cancer, at the peak of the covid pandemic (The cancer was found in April 2020 she passed early February 2021), I had really stepped up my game. I became a different person. It was not the first time in my life a crisis had prompted such a transformation.
My goal was to see if I could stay in such a state without an outside crisis. How much easier life would be if I were always competent, serious, and effective? I realised after a bit of reading and research what I was doing during the crisis, naturally, was very close to Stoicism. (When I was not in a crisis, I was much more an Epicurean.)
Reasons Not to Worry highlights in these chapters on death Seneca’s letter to Marcia to help her recover over the death of her son. She had been in grief for three years and Seneca was having none of it. Man, this was refreshing to read. I was unfamiliar with the letter itself despite listening to endless podcasts and reading daily Stoic reflections, etc. Therefore, the title of this review is a new pair of glasses. Brigid Delaney brings new information and a fresh perspective to Stoicism.
Seneca’s advice mirrored my experience. After Sherrie died (literally that evening or the next day) I watched a bunch of Ted talks on grief. One man had the same experience that I had. Wife dying at home in hospice from ovarian cancer. But he was so angry and so bitter. It almost seemed alien to me in my grief. Another woman was mourning her mother’s death… which made some sense till you hit the punch line that her mother died in 1981. I mean, my mother died when I was nine in 1977. I think of her every once in a while, but I would hope I have worked through that grief almost fifty years later.
All the Ted Talks had the same message. Well-meaning people will tell you to move on and they are ignorant people that do not know what you’re going through and you do not and should not listen to them. Nobody knows the pain you are in.
Oh course, this is ridiculous. If you live long enough, you will certainly know the death of a grandparent, parent, spouse, or even a child. This is a universal human experience. What Seneca said in so many words two thousand years ago is still true today. What Brigid Delaney hints at and I have experienced as well is the so-called five stages of grief are a well-meaning bit of hooey from the early seventies with little real world application.
I would add to the hooey pile that weird grieving chart that all the Ted Talkers were parroting, as if they had all read the same brochure. They all also parroted that it is not okay to tell people they need to move on. Yes, that includes people still mourning thier mother who died in a car crash in 1981.
By the fourth or fifth Ted Talk, I was practically yelling at the screen that these people really needed to move on. Now don’t get me wrong. Stoicism or not, you will not be okay the first couple of months after an enormous loss, like a spouse, sibling, or a child. My personal decision making was, shall we say, suspect? But if I had not attempted to move on and instead wallowed in my grief and victimhood, I can only imagine the outcome.
Now Brigid Delaney reconnects with Global Warming once again and at this point, as she is describing its effects in all these countries where she has witnessed the devastation firsthand it occurs to me she is a travel writer by trade and now I am sure there are jobs that contribute more to the global warming crisis. But a travel writer has to be in the top ten? No?
Brigid has spent much of Reasons Not to Worry, with one foot in her Guardian column activism and one foot in Stoicism. Then she does something amazing. Perhaps speculating that neither her colleagues, bosses or regular readers will bother to read the entire book, she attacks the idea of victimhood.
Victimhood is an anathema of Stoicism. It is also the keystone to the philosophy holding her employer’s newspaper together. If there is one thing the Guardian loves, it is victims. If a tornado hits somewhere in the Midwest, the Guardian will look for a marginalized person among the wreckage to explain how thier trailer being destroyed is a greater injustice.
That Brigid takes the wheel and runs over victimhood with such effectiveness, she backs up and runs over it again just to be sure makes me think the Stoicism has really stuck. Good for her. Should make for some interesting cocktail party talk in the future.
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