Thanksgiving (2023) Review

Well, at least it is not a turkey

Thanksgiving (2023): 7 out of 10: is a slasher horror movie directed by Eli Roth, inspired by the mock trailer he created for the 2007 “Grindhouse” double feature. Thanksgiving is set in the small town of Plymouth, Massachusetts, where Thanksgiving is a deeply cherished holiday. The story begins with a stampede during a doorbuster sale at a locally owned department store. (An ersatz Walmart). On the one-year anniversary of this horrific incident, a series of gruesome murders begins as a mysterious killer in a pilgrim mask targets residents who are connected to the tragedy.

As the body count rises, a group of survivors, including a high school athlete, a local sheriff, and a server, band together to uncover the identity of the killer. The murderer, who appears to be motivated by a twisted sense of vengeance, uses Thanksgiving-themed methods to dispatch his victims, adding a macabre twist to the holiday’s traditions.

The Good

The Good: Eli Roth is on record saying the cat is the best actor in the movie. I can understand why. The cat Tonic (Pet Sematary) has easily the best scene in the movie. I know this is a slasher film and I get nervous anytime an animal such as a cat is involved. (See the recent Night Swim for trailer for a lazy example of this trope.)Here, the murderous Thanksgiving slasher pets the cat and leaves him out some food. Good movie.

There is a lot to like in this slasher, which is a full-length version of that trailer included in the Death Proof double feature movie. Lots of decent kills with some solid gore effects. No nudity which is a surprise for the genre and for Roth, but “Thanksgiving” delivers the goods.

The film unsurprisingly leans heavily into the Thanksgiving feel with kills that lend themselves nicely to the cheesiness of the premise. I mean, one victim is cooked like a Thanksgiving turkey.

The Bad

The Bad: Well, the inciting incident (A riot/trampling during a Black Friday sale) really is not a thing anymore. The incident is clearly a riff on Wal-Mart where 34-year-old employee Jdimytai Damour was trampled and died on Black Friday. But that incident took place in 2008.

This year stores are not even bothering to open for Black Friday sales at midnight. And doorbusters tend to be online only or make you sign up for the phone app. The idea of people lining up at a store to physically enter is a true thing of the past. Much like The International in 2009 with its beepers and payphones, Eli Roth’s Thanksgiving feels very dated just from the premise. Script might have been in a drawer a bit too long.

What also feels dated is Roth’s instance to make his characters the most douchiest people on earth. That worked in Hostel because that is the way the Europeans would view the Americans and the twist halfway through added a particular irony when the predator became the prey, so to speak.

It makes little sense here, however. Nobody is out and out awful, but our final girl is a bit of blank slate and not in a good way. Many of the people she is surrounded with barely have any presence at all. Part of the issue is the film has too many characters. I know I am always complaining about a lack of cannon fodder in such films and now we have a cornucopia of characters and I am still complaining. I am obviously some sort of slasher film Goldilocks.

Still while some side characters are fun (The redneck heavy metal gun selling father-son team and the nerd who looks for all the world like Steve Buschimi’s illegitimate love child are particular standouts.) The main group, however, seems like interchangeable idiots.

The Ugly (Spoiler Alert)

The Ugly: (Um spoiler alert?) The Sherrif Patrick Dempsey is the killer. Well, that might surprise you. I mean, he has no apparent motivation until the dénouement. It turns out he was in love with a victim of the doorbuster stampede. But it was a secret love, so good luck figuring that out.

Even with that connection to the inciting incident, he has no motivation for such a shall we say themed response. Nothing about knowing a woman who was trampled screams kill everyone in a Thanksgiving themed rampage.

Okay, let’s pretend that he has a secret motivation that the movie did not give us and he decided to go all in on the Thanksgiving theme for um reasons. There is one other issue… he physically could not have committed most of the murders. He simply was not there.

There are multiple incidents (The High School, the parade, the live stream) where he is clearly in his sheriff’s uniform and people have eyes on him and even with a Star Trek transporter Dempsey would have been hard pressed to change clothes and get into killer mode. On the live stream, he is across town at the sheriff’s office. At the high school he is in the parking lot directing the response to the incident while simultaneously setting traps for a gymnast?

Hell, as he is chasing the final girl, he teleports past the fence to be next to his car with a head injury.

These are not a plot holes. These are plot tunnels. Plot worm holes in reality. Look, I am not expecting a murder mystery level of craftsmanship or even, say, Saw II’s level of craftmanship. But this is ridiculous. I am guessing the script at one point (Perhaps even the shooting script) had two killers and for some reason they changed it in post.

It really sours an up till then enjoyable experience. Particularly since the movie invites you to figure out the killer on your own.

In Conclusion

In Conclusion. A bad, frustrating ending and some less than stellar performances aside, this is a solid slasher. Great kills, fantastic cat acting and good theming pull up a recommend. I mean Thanksgiving is stupid as all get out, but it is entertaining.